Friday, May 17, 2013

Was or Am?


A few weeks ago I read a sentence on a blog that has stuck with me. Unfortunately I don’t recall who’s blog it was (an example that I might read a few too many blogs….)

Anyhoo…

The sentence was something like this:
 “I know children who are adopted and adults who were adopted”.
It caused me to pause…. 

Why is the semantics different for children and adults? At what age does adoption stop being a current/ongoing event to something that happened in the past?

My own semantics are completely opposite to the original posters. When I talk about myself, I will say “I am adopted”… an ongoing state of being, much like I refer to myself as being brunette. And yet, when I’m talking about Liam, I am more likely to say “he was adopted.” I hear myself doing it, and I’ve often wondered why?

Having thought about this sentence for the last week or so, I think the difference for me is that I have embraced adoption as a part of me. It has shaped the person I have become. And yet, I’m not quite ready to use it to define Liam. Perhaps my view is skewed as I’m the parent in his case, and I do see his adoption as something that happened on a specific day. He may one day see himself also defined by the fact that he was/is adopted and then he too may say “I am adopted”.

Which version do you use? Does the persons age factor into your choice of words?
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