Adoption thoughts

I have a lot of adoption thoughts swirling about right now:

• The last email I got from Iris was in February. Feb 10th to be exact. For some reason I have not been able to bring myself to call her. Sure I have lots of reasons - I'm busy, work is crazy, I can only call in the morning and it's always too late by the time I think to pick up the phone. But they are just excuses. I'm not really sure what is stopping me.

• I'm still torn about what to do about finding my father's family.

• Thinking about my father's family makes me think about Liam's father. I wonder if we should try to find him before too much time passes and it gets that much harder. But do I want to find him for me or for Liam?

• We still don't have any communication with Liam's mother "K". It's coming up on the time that we would send an update letter. I will continue to honour my commitment to do that. I wonder though if I should touch on the topic of communication or just continue with updates on Liam and leave out the hard stuff?

and so it goes......