A genuine master of the air, the swallow swoops low along the ground at
high speed, changing direction in the blink of an eye.
Growing up, my parents barn was full of barn swallows. Every corner of every outdoor building had their little mud nests hidden amongst the rafters. And I hated them. Mostly because they hated me. I kept my bike in one of the sheds and every year a family of swallows would nest right above the door. So every time I tried to get my bike out or put it away Mummy and Daddy swallow would go on alert and try to attack me before I could attack their nest. They would swoop and dive and I would cover my head with my arms and run screaming into the house.
As a result I now have a full blown phobia of birds.
My biggest fear is that a bird is going to swoop towards me and get their beak stuck in my forehead.
Yeah.. when you type it out it sounds pretty dumb. When the birds are swooping at you it seems very realistic!
And that is what caused yesterday's freak out. Liam and I were walking home from soccer when out of no where a Blue Jay came swooping at my head! He pulled up at the last second but I still felt his feet brush through my hair. He landed on a tree branch at my eye level right behind me! Before you think that I'm exaggerating due to my already quite pronounced phobia, let me tell you what Liam's reaction was. Keep in mind that Liam is 2 feet shorter then I am, so he did not have the same bird's eye view that I did! He saw the bird coming at us, screamed and DUCKED! Because of my recent falling-down-the-stairs injury I was not able to move very quickly and really, it happened so fast that I don't think I could have ducked anyway.
It was all I could do to not freak out in front of Liam. One of my parenting goals has been to NOT pass on my weirdnesses and phobias. Luckily we were only a few houses from home so I was able to send him running ahead to tell Mummy all about it. I made it home to find Hilary laughing in the doorway (spouses are SOOOO supportive of their partners fears aren't they?)
I think I'll be carrying an umbrella with me for the rest of the summer! Either to protect my forehead or to use as a bat for any incoming projectiles!
9 comments:
Thanks for the comment! I know what you mean about birds. As a wildlife biologist I get calls all the time about attacking birds, and it can be traumatic and surprising. Biologically, you can understand why, but it doesn't make it any easier or less annoying. Maybe you can look at it as a good opportunity to teach Liam about parenting.
OK that is the funniest story ever...and weirdnesses and phobias...you are a funny funny girl..go Hillary gig for me too
My little brother has a similar fear of birds. I don't know if his also stems from growing up on a farm, but we had barn swallows too and they are EVIL. They'd divebomb our barn cats and everything. I mean, come on, birdies, CATS? They are your enemy! Yeesh! (My own fear regarding the birds was more of a getting crapped upon issue than a getting attacked issue....)
I too have tried very hard not to pass along my things to the kiddo, but somehow despite my efforts, she eats her foods one thing at a time, just like me. Oops!
We had barn swallows too and they are to this day my favorite bird :-) I loved watching them dive bomb our cats and I loved watching the mother birds feeding their full grown babies.
About 12 years ago we rented a house in the country and we had this incredible cat who could catch anything. And one day we found a dead swallow at our back door where our cat always left his 'treasures'. I couldn't believe he actually caught one.
Anyways, sorry about the bird scare. That would have freaked me out too, especially feeling it in my hair (shivers).
Nanita
I don't share your bird phobia, but have my own with snakes. I can't even watch them on TV and just typing this makes my heart race. So while it's not the same phobia, I still completely understand.
I say sport that umbrella proud my fellow phobia friend. (:
I'm a huge Alfred Hitchcock fan, and the movie "The Birds" always freaked me out. I don't blame you for your phobia!
Your phobia sounds totally rational to me -- I'd be terrified too! Sorry about the scare with the blue jay!
Hi there!!
thanks for the comment!!
I didn't like birds much when I was young....when I was six walking home from Girl Scouts one day, a bird pooped on my head (and not just alittle bit) and when I got home in tears, my mom laughed at me and told me to stop crying, that it was good luck if a bird pooped on you..... Seriously?? LOL
I live by the beach in FL and to this day I still cringe when seagulls fly over, as I'm certain I'm going to get pooped on again!!
I think the umbrella might be a really good idea for you!!!!
Aw, Andy! I understand your bird fear now. But I did laugh at the image of a little sparrow impaled in your forehead. Sorry. ;)
Our sparrows are pretty mellow, and then, I did raise the two this summer, so perhaps my surviving Orphan Birdie spread the good word for me?
The Swallows, however, I will duck for.
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